A new goal!!!

Did you guys think I'd given up?  Girl gone forever?  Nope!  Not me!  Perseverance, which means never give up!  Here is sweaty old me after a jog the other day.  It amazes me how sweaty I can get and it feels good!

 Whenever I need a little motivation I look back at this licence picture.  Ugh,,, I weighed upwards of 300 pounds there.  Scary right?  I look like I'm gonna explode!  Never going back there!!!

Here's the thing.  I've still been slacking.  I know I haven't been doing my best.  I cheat way to much on the weekends and I haven't lost any real weight in like a year.  I am not down to where I want to be at all!  I do well when I have a specific goal and time frame in mind.  A couple a weeks ago my mom mentioned the idea of going on a family vacation all together and she has now scheduled it for June 2014.  That's 11 months away.  I am going to lose at least 40 pounds by then.  I will do it. That will put me at 160.  I know right? That number still sounds like so much, but I really do carry my weight pretty well and I wanna see what I look like at that weight.  I would love it if I could get down lower but I want to be able to accomplish this goal.

I'm motivated, I'm inspired, and I can do this!!!!

Trips

Well last weekend aways eating didn't go so well. I should have known.  We were pretty much at the mercy of what Ben's mom had at her house and what she provided for us to eat due to lack of $ funds.  I had to get our new van's plates which were very pricey and we took our sick dog to the vet, very pricey too!  I am thankful though that even though there wasnt much healthy food we were still able to go and spend the time with them and the only thing it cost us was the gas to get there.

So this week I've been trying hard to stay on the healthy path.  The last two days have been great.  Salads for lunch and good dinners too! Ive managed to stay away from the unhealthy snacking and overdoing it on my trigger foods.  After Jessie's soccer game last night my sister wanted us to go out for ice cream.  It was a charity event for someone she knows.
Well of course the kids wanted to go and since it was the last day of school and they had both done so well this year with there grades I decided to go, we even lucked out and my Mom went and paid since the kids got all A's!!  Score.  LOL   I didnt overdo it with the toppings like I normally do.  And I counted the calories for everything and stayed within my daily budget.  Also when we got home I went on a 2 mile walk/jog and then played basketball with the kids.

I'm trying so hard to be able to run.  I'm doing better dealing with my hip pain, but still feel like my lungs are on fire and give up to easily.  Another issue I'm having there is my stinkin ear buds fall out every single time I run.  I need to find a pair that stay put!  Its very distracting when I lose my music motivation and they are flapping around.  Makes me quit everytime!  ANY SUGGESTIONS?  I'm just using the ones that came with my iphone.

Tomorrow morning I leave to go on a weekend trip with my mom and sisters!  Never done this before and it should be fun.  I'm excited.  I'm gonna enjoy myself and not obsess about my food, but I will try and make some healthy choices.  I think we will be doing a lot of walking so that should help balance out things.

I'm really doing it this time!  I'm fully motivated to lose this weight and look great!   I'm going to do it!  I'm going to do it!  I'm  going to do it!!!!!

Cleaning out the fridge

Yesterdays eating started off well, then I blew it after lunch.  2 reasons why,,, Biscoff spread and these new amazing chips we discovered while at my dad's house last weekend.  The biscoff spread is a cookie butter, have you ever had any?  Amazing stuff, but so dangerous for me,, I knew not to buy it, seriously!  But Aldi had it and they never have it so I felt this need to buy it...ugh,, I should have known better,, I still have a whole container in the cupboard,, I had bought 2.  When its here its like it calls to me.. I know I sound ridiculous but its true.  I ate lunch(should have been satisfied with that, since it was the same thing I ate for dinner the night before and I was fine), but my belly just kept telling me it needed something more and it needed that cookie butter.    Then later we had a early dinner and then I went to my sisters and when I got home I was starving and my mentality was well I already ruined the day earlier so why not have some of those yummy flavored chips we bought.    I know I know,,  its all mind of matter, but Im having trouble with my mind I guess .   It doesnt help that I'm extremely stressed out about our trip and feel like I'm running around in circles lately. Ben and I are always fighting.  I'm a big time emotional eater.

We are leaving for a few days tomorrow afternoon so my eating is going to be revolved around eating what needs to be ate so it doesnt go to waste while were gone.  Thats another issue I have,, feeling like I need to not waste things.  Money is so tight that I hate the thought of wasting items.  Its ok though cuz most of the things that will go to waste is fresh stuff so I still plan to stay within my calories.  My menus just might look a little weird.  I hope I can stay on track over the weekend.  Its always so hard for me when we are away from home.

Good day

I feel good about today.  I stuck with healthy eating and even found a yummy new snack!  I took a banana and cut it into slices then topped it with a tablespoon of chocolate PB2.  Yummy  and only 136 calories.  After our busy day of kiddos and soccer Ben and I went on our walk/jog.  I'm getting better.  I want to be a runner so bad,, I'm slowly getting there.  Ben seems to be a natural at it. I'm proud of him, and a little jealous, lol.  I hope tomorrow goes as well with the eating.  My menu will probably be about the same.  Then traveling to South Whitley to see my niece play tball.  Hopefully I can squeeze in some exercise somewhere tomorrow.

A whole year??

Its been almost a year since I have blogged here. I havent given up, I'm still trying to lose weight.  But, I've only lost a few pounds since the last time I weighed in.  I need to up my game.  I'm going to do it this time!!!!

Here's my problem, I struggle constantly.  I want to be one of those people that eat what they want and don't have to worry about getting fatter, but I am NOT one of those people.  I look at ice cream and gain two pounds.  Its so not fair.  But apparently it's my life.

I had told myself that I didn't need to restrict myself when it comes to food.  I want to make a lifestyle change, which I still am, but the pounds are not coming off by eating whatever I want.  So I'm going to be more strict, eat more "diet" food, and less crap.  Seems simple enough right?  Well its not but if I can just keep this mentality that I have right now it will all work out.

The hardest thing for me is I live with children. They dont always want to eat a perfect diet and I don't feel like they should have to.  They make me feel guilty for not buying them icecream ever, but when I do I eat it. :(  I need more self control!  I will do this!!

As always follow along with me on myfitnesspal.com  I am going to be brutally honest on my logging, I've been slacking lately!  

Another good week

AS of this morning my weight is 206.   Almost there to ONEderland!!  I had the goal of being below 200 when we went to California and I still think that's obtainable.   Its 6 in a half weeks away,, I should be able to accomplish that.    Then my next goal is getting into a 12 pants size.  I've hit a size 14 now but apparently theres a pretty big jump between the two.  My mom had a size juniors 13 shorts at her house that I tried on and I couldn't believe how much smaller they are compared to my 14's.  

Everything has been going pretty well.  I've been keeping up with my exercise and after 3 weeks our elliptical is finally fixed so I can use that again.  As far as food I'm doing pretty well, staying within my calories and if I want something really bad then I just have it.  I just make sure I have the calories for it.  Overall though I try to keep it pretty healthy.  Lots of lean protein and veggies and fruits. 

I also hit my 100 days on my fitness pal.  Logging my food has become second nature.  I don't even think about it anymore.  Just do it.  Everyone that has a smart phone should download the myfitnesspal app.  Its so helpful!!

3 more pounds gone forever!

I had a 3 pound loss this week!! Very happy with that! I changed up my exersize this week. I dont know if maybe that had something to do with it. I also tried to try and stay a little closer to my calorie goal. I was being under by a few hundred calories.
That means I only have 14 more pounds til I hit ONEderland! I hate having a 2 at the begining of my weight and it will be great to have a one there! Heres hoping for another great week.